Great spirits often encounter violent opposition from mediocre minds

I ask for God's wisdom to rain on me.

Friday, July 28, 2006

Mummy is the best!

Finally I am down with sore throat and ear infection! body aching....woooahhhhhhh....
I knew this day will come! So happy!

I really needed this rest :)

And guess what, I teh my mother to cook for me. Mu choi kau yok. You know the steam pork with some vege stuff in black sauce and dreied chili. Super yummy!

And she also boiled yummy yummy soup for me, inside got bittergourd, carrot, tomato and also crab and prawn. Fwah shiok!

Mummy loves me!

I love mummy too! hehehe

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Hubby away

Bubi is now in Korea working. Me all alone in Singapore feeling really tired. Feel asleep on my bedroom floor just now at 7 plus and woke up when my bubi was online. Chat a lil and now bathe. Can't even get around doing my assignment for ERC.

Started my 9 to 5 (more like round the clock) job last week and I feel already burnt.Who can ever tahan such hours man?
I am amazed at all the 9 to 5-vers. I wake up at 8am, get in my brushing teeth, shitting and putting on make up in half and hour and then zip off in my picanto to work. Drivers all over are impatient in the morning and every SINGLE day some asshole will tailgate me.

What the hell is with all these drivers, don't they know it is super annoying? My friend told me to try slightly braking the next time some asshole tailgate me to scare the shit out of them. I seriously don't want to frighten anybody cos I know being frightened during driving is not a good thing.

sigh...going to sleep soon and it's only 10pm.

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Talking to Nono

pbb: it is important to find someone who loves you more than you love him.
nono: why leh?
pbb: cos when you know he loves you so much, you would love him back too :)


What I am trying to say is that. Standing on a women's point of view, we have to protect ourselves. Our hearts are more brittle and our tears flow a lot faster and heavier. When the man we are with love us lesser, we are on the losing end and whatever happens in the relationship we take it much harder. It's different from men. You do not see men sobbing and screaming as much as women do.

I know love should be selfless right?

I am glad I have found my one. It took me 3 years into my relationship with him to know that he really loves me ALOT. Despite me gaining 10 kg, he has never utter a single word and still tells me I am the prettiest of all. Now when we fight, it is almost a 10 min affair and then we are lovey dovey all over again. I respect his work and who he is. He has shown me the stability a man can be in taking care of me and I am appreciative of that.

During my lowest times, he has stood by me and gave me great comfort. One time he told me seeing me so sad he is really sad too and his heart breaks when I am like that. That sentence alone gave me strength to fight the hurricane in my path. (ok, I have tears in my eyes now.)

Knowing how much he loves me only make me want to make him even happier than ever by doing little things. Ironing his shirts, helping him plan what to pack for his overseas assignments and going to the bridal studio myself vountarily without him because I know man are just not interested in the details of the dress and would rather watch TV.

I am sure that even if I am struck down with a illness so serious that I cannot bear children or be terminally ill, he will still stick to me. His steadfast love for me is so strong that I know I will never find another man to love me this much (except you, dad.).

It wasn't easy in the beginning years o our courtship. Endless fights and tears. Misunderstanding and mistrust. Many heartsbreaks and finally one day, I decided enough was enough. He is a man of few words when it comes to relationship, he did not ask me to stay which I secretly wanted.

After some time, I called him up and said nothing but cry on the phone. He asked me where I was and came over to pick me up to send me to my next destination. We did not talk much on the in the car. But somehow we both knew everything was going to be alright.

Now? married liao lor :)

I guess what I am trying to babble here is that if knowing how long and far he would go through with me, it makes me want to be there for him as well. And he has shown me how selfless love has make me want to even treasure him.

Incoherently thoughts for a Sunday!

Hen's night!

I lurvvve my sistars!!!!

Thank you for giving us the "night" of our lives!!!!!

Really from the bottom of my heart, thank you!

Pokpokkay!

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

I am xiao nu ren

Have been ironing my bubi's clothes for the last 2 days. ( I know 2 days only right?)

Even massage him using the Osim hand held massager cos he is feeling sore on his left thigh. (Bubi fell down the stairs. I think he got orh qi-air there.Then I even used my fav BENGAY to rub rub his thigh. (I swear by BENGAY seriously!) And because it hurts for him to walk I even fetch him his shaver from the living room when I was already happily lying in bed when he mumbled to himself "Hmmm, where's my shaver?"

This morning he told me his thigh felt better. Me feel happy. :)

Am I a xiao nu ren?

I like taking care of him and his needs. But I have my own ambitious side too. The best thing is I know he appreciates me. When I iron his shirt he goes "Bubi loves me :)"

My heart melts a little and I happily iron his shirt.

I am xiao nu ren!

I know why I married you.

Thank you for all your love.
Thank you for being mine.
Thank you for your unselfishness.
Thank you.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

No more Bird Bird

Ringg......

Bubi: Hello?
PBC: No more bird bird :(
BUbi: HUh? No more?
PBC: No more bird bird. Bird bird fly away.
Bubi: Which one? Mama bird?
PBC: No the baby bird fly away.
Bubi: Oh....so fast?
PBC: :(

There is a hugh plant outside my main door and a nest had been formed there a month again. I have been following the building of the nest to 2 eggs being laid and hatched. Today finally i saw the baby bird flew off when i walked closer to examine the nest.

I have became so accustomed to seeing them and smiling to myself and going shhhhh to my family members when they enter or exit the house too loudly.

My heart aches now that the family is gone.

Byebye bird bird.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Aiyah No Connection?

Ogey, no connection at my brother's place. No wonder no reply me emails. Sheesh.

My brother says "This is France, it's damn fucked up. Won't get fixed so fast"

Ogey lor......at least I know my folks still alive and kicking!

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

What life beholds for me?

I have again been thrown into another totally surprising realm of my life. Sometimes I just do not know what comes my way. I take whatever comes my way with stride and not try to let anything hold me down.

My situation seems crazy to others and even to me. One day I am doing this and another day I am doing that.

Who am I? I am still trying to define who I am. But at the same time I know I suffer from identity crisis from playing too many roles at 1 time. Too ambitious of me, I know.

Where am I going and where will I end?

I know exactly where but I am not telling you :)

senseless post

Monday, July 03, 2006

Where is dad?

Hmmm, how come you never write to me?

Are you and mum ok?

May: Crappy month

Too many things have gone wrong.

This sucks.

Saturday, July 01, 2006

Something I read off the internet

Why do people get married?

What happens after you get married and falls in love with another? The point is you are not in lust but there is something that the other person has that your own partner does not have? Does your heart ache for the other but yet feel guilty because of the vows you have made to your spouse? It does not mean you do not love your spouse anymore or even less than before. Something about the other person just seems to make you brighten up instantly. You just want to know the other party better, see the other party more often and maybe somewhere deep down you think how you should met the other party earlier.

So why does the human race want/need to get married?

I am married. In fact, recently made the jump from single to married status within seconds of saying "I DO". Now suddenly on all surveys, government questionnaires, lucky draw coupons and so on, I find myself ticking the tiny little married box.

I love my husband very much. (weird now calling him that, just a few weeks ago he was still my "boyfriend".) He has gone thru my moments of madness, bouts of crying, series of unreasonable demands and yet still wants me and loves me dearly. I cannot imagine anyone else who would want to put up with me and yet still supports me.

I love him dearly as well and cannot imagine life without him. How I know? My heart breaks into a million pieces when we fight. I lose sleep over him when he ignores me. My tears flow freely when he rebukes me. Who or what else would have power to create such emotions within me except for the ONE?

Here's the tricky part.

There is this guy out there. I have a hugh crush on him and him ONLY. He does not know it nor does anybody else. I can't tell anybody. I am afraid of the repercussions. I am confused. But I can't help it. Everytime I see him my heart does a little dance on it's own. I feel a little floaty when I see him. His smile makes me melt. Sometimes when I look at him and he looks right back I can feel this strong connection. The communication that exists without words. I am fairly sure this is a one sided affair on my part. Sometimes I even wonder if he knows my lil secret. He is a gentleman and would not expose me but there are times I wish he knew and reciprocate the feelings.

And I have been feeling this way since DAY 1 of our acquaintance. It is not a one off feeling for me. Then I was attached, he was attached. Shortly he was single and I was wondering if we would ever have a chance together. But I never broke off with my boyfriend and then I said "Yes" to his proposal and now am married to a very sweet man.

I know I made the decision to marry by saying "Yes" and some would say I am being very selfish by thinking of another man.

I am sorry. I am so sorry. I am so so sorry.

The feelings of a human being are so complex at times. Is it possible to love 2 persons at the same time? Maybe my husband is also in the same situation as me? Secretly, if he is, it makes me feel less guilty but I will probably punish him till the end of time.

Me selfish? Yes. Me feelings complex? Definitely. Me regret marrying my husband? No. Me telling the other man about my feelings? No.

So why did I get married?

I can't remember why now....

Benson's wedding


This was in 2004 Oct. I was one of the "brothers" for my friend, Benson's wedding.

Taken outside his wife, Elaine's flat.

Saw this on your friendster and decided to "steal" the photo.

Thank you Benson for making me your "Xiong Di" and your friend!